Monday, 25 February 2013

Party Time

 It started off so well. I was invited to the party of the year by Hostess With The Mostess Tamera, click her name for the full party guest list, everyone looked gorgeous.
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Nobody likes my shoes...
 
 I made... fifty fucking vol-u-vents



 





 
 


Party hat - made by Mike
Lipstick - Revlon Cherries In The Snow
Cocktail ring - closed down awesome shop in Oxford
Dress - Next via my sister
Shoes - Ebay
Cocktail - Blue Curacao, Raspberry Gin and Tonic

Wednesday, 20 February 2013

Filth is my politics!


My friend Crysi introduced me to John Waters several years ago but I only watched the infamous Pink Flamingos recently. And I fell in love with it. Crysi asked me how that made me feel. I replied "Satisfied".

I'm yet to do a full Divine post... I need a wig and then I'll be right on it. 
I bought this pink jacket on ebay along with a matching dress which unfortunately doesn't fit. The jacket was originally knee length, but I have enough knee length coats. 

 I added the collar and buttons too. The brooch is a present from a friend

I lurve this dress. I really should wear it more, what's surprising is that it was designed by the deeply unfashionable tit grabbing, screeching, overbearing fashion adviser harridans Trinny and Susannah. The tights were from Dororthy Ps and the shoes from a friend. The slip was green for a while but I decided to blast it with kingfisher blue. The Sunglasses were bought in Camden and I added the little flowers, a la D&G.


 

I may not be The Filthiest Person Alive but I have learnt that to shock and annoy people is deeply satisfying. Never tone down or apologise for your weirdness.






You may've spotted a flash of blue lurking round my bosom in one of those photos.
I dyed another bra... and added the bow.

Despite me talking about being A Thief And A Shitkicker, I still get excited over domesticity.
Yesterday I spotted this mouthwatering pattern in a charity shop window, which turned out to be a pair of curtains. I had to have them and they instantly brightened up my room.

Winter isn't finished with us yet (us in Europe that is) so I need a bit of Spring colour. They're 80s but have a gorgeous 30s look about them.

I also bought
I have a really collection of these padded hangers now. I can't get enough, I need a whole cupboard full. The collar is by Coast.

I got a wonderful parcel from one of the most wonderful bloggers around. The super sexy, creative and annoyingly prolific Joni James
Joni screen printed a picture I posted on my blog last month and sent me loads of copies, the mad generous darling that she is


Thank you so much Joni. I need to start getting creative with these.

 Lastly, I finished my first piece of proper embroidery, a beetle which I'd copied out of a fantastic book I found for 40p called "Embroidery And Nature". It's a bit wonky but I'm really pleased with it!


Apparently it's London Fashion Week. Boring. I'd rather have half of Divine's self confidence and most of her wardrobe than anything that's on offer there.
The Girl Can't Help It.
Thanks Mr Waters


Sunday, 17 February 2013

You, You're Driving Me Crazy


Wonder how many people wear a tulle skirt to their first driving practice?
Sweatshirt - Charity shop
Tulle skirt - Ebay
Leggings - Cheapy shop
Socks - Ebay

I look grumpy, but really I was squinting... because it was SUNNY. Wow!

I didn't do too badly, I'm sure I'll master the clutch eventually. My top speed was 12mph!!

One day I hope to become as good at driving as I am at Mario Kart... throwing bananas at people optional


My face is driving me crazy, my acne rosacea (acne with extra redness) has flared up and dark circles have enveloped my eyes. Even with this gorgeous lemon Boucle (both yellow and boucle make me think of the MEGA ROCKSTAR SUPER MODEL MIZ BAGG - seriously she should be a model, gush gush gush)

--- anyway even with the Spring colours and the elaborate snot coloured collar hanging like a decorative bogey round my neck I still look spotty and peaky. Peelie Wallie as my Scottish friend says. 
Scowl scowl... Almost a complete outfit here. 
Cardi - Present but from Benetton
Top - Was a dress, I cut the bottom off and added the collar - ebay
Snot Bag - M&S
Skirt - Ebay
Tight - Primark

I also wore

Top - Primark

Not much on the charity shop front this week, though I did find this great 60s style swing coat during a brief Sunday trip to Beaconsfield.
 

Obviously couldn't resist a china poodle

I also picked up the brooch, which is pretty old... and I've recently learnt to tell the ages of brooches from these two brilliant videos on youtube. 

The thing with brooches is that the backs look surprisingly shiny no matter what the age... so dating by the catch is really helpful.

There we go, we've all learnt something today... I learnt NOT TO TAKE MY FOOT OFF THE CLUTCH whilst changing gear or braking. 

This song and band are one of my all time favourites...


BYE!

Thursday, 14 February 2013

Puking My Heart Out


I'm such an old romantic

It's been an up and down and roundabout week. On Saturday I spent the day in Camden with the sardonic and sensational Lakota - But I didn't get any photos of her! Doh.... well we were talking non stop and it was bitterly cold and often raining. 
We visited House Of Guadalupe, which is a booth selling traditional and not so traditional Mexican art - whatever it is... it's NOT kitsch as the floating Virgin of Guadalupe flash intro and Zombie Queen Shrine will testify...
I decided to make my own.

My friend to David came round for charity shop fun, photo session and a stitch n bitch. 
He's a fantastic photographer. Here's a couple of photos he took of me in my boudoir...


There'll be some more soon. 

In town, I found a kitsch cult classic, slightly water damaged, but huge and only £9.95

Yes! It's J H Lynch's Tina! It's more than I normally pay for a print but I just had to have her.

Remember in January I did a sort of resolution post? One of the things I wanted to finally do is learn to drive.... well I've got my provisional licence and I'm insured to drive our Suzuki Swift, so I'll be taking my first tentative steps round the industrial estate on Sunday.
Lovely Lakota bought me this as a good luck charm...
 It's NOT kitsch. 
Here's a video of Monty singing. His hobbies include: Sleeping, Barking, Growlling, Singing, Eating and Chasing Squirrels. He LOVES any electronic sounding music.



Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Can You Smell That?...

...What?

How Volatile Life Is

This post is dedicated to two fellow bloggers and two wonderful films. The fantastical Desiree's son coined the phrase "Squalid Glamour", which describes a look both of us really love... but first...

The title of this post is from a fantastic film my always inspirational friend Edie introduced me to
Daisies
Daisies is a 1966 Czech surrealist feminist farce. The two protagonists cause havoc where ever they go. I utterly love it, it's playful, addictive and enchanting. I suggest you check it out on youtube
 
 
 Here's Edie's Daisies illustration
 

 My next dedication is to the film Blithe Spirit. It's based on a Noel Coward play. I adore the dry witty dialogue and the wonderful outfit Elvira wears
 

And if you remember yesterdays post, I dyed a lot of clothes a pale ghostly green

Headband - Made by me
Slip - Ebay, was already green
The Uber Bra - Dyed by me

Someone else loves the squalid glamour of underwear as outerwear...

Here you go... the UBER BRA in all it's glory
Slip - Jumble sale - dyed by me
Phone - Original 40s and in full working order

I have been naughty and bought a few vintage cotton nighties. Here's my favourite.




Long live SQUALID GLAMOUR